When did I become so impatient? I used to be so zen. I got to visit the monastery, I slept, I read, I had time to know myself.
Now? I spread myself thin, I spend too much time doing other things. Extra curricular things. Teaching classes I don't totally know how to teach.

I lack patience, but I don't want to pray for patience because the last time I prayed for some sort of virtue, I had my butt handed to me.

Sometimes I want to blame caffeine. I love the coffee ritual, I wasn't a coffee drinker until I was 28 (maybe 27) but now I am a full blown coffee drinker.

maybe it's sleep. I love our kids, but they are terrible at falling asleep, especially at this time of year, when the sun is up until midnight. or so it seems. Here on the edge of MST zone, it's still a tiny bit light at 10:30 pm. So they have to fall asleep in full blown daylight. I can't even fish in the evening yet.

waahh wahh. poor me. Just don't pray for patience for me, God already knows what I need but I'm not asking. not today anyway. ugh. just mercy.

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