1.19.2006

coffee pt 2

No, I am not off coffee, this is just the beginning. I hope I am not up all night, if I am, I will almagamate my late night thoughts and bring them here too.

I didn't like how I felt, but I got lots done. I prefer the single malt I am sipping currently, though it is not an awake sort of thing. I have to go for a second interveiw with the board on monday or tuesday. I am planning to go to the monastery on monday, I have to call them to confirm, and it will depend on the flexibility of the people I need to meet with.
I wonder if I will have to explain how I can assent to the statement of faith. I don't think that should be a problem, I do agree with everything they say in it. I probably won't trot out some things that take a little longer to explain, though I am sure they could get it if they needed to, and given enough time.
A good friend from salmon arm sasid they thought it would be good for my disciplined, regimented life to be teaching. yes. disciplined. I am learning a lot about that these days. I have gotten a lot done lately, which is good. I hope it is in the right direction, and trust it is. I keep re-reading my proposal and it gets me more and more excited.

yes, its nice to be in vancouver. I am staying at my friends' house, they are away, so I am sleeping here and going to the symposium right away tomorrow morning. I will have LOTS of notes to transcribe tomorrow, perhaps I will start tonight. so many ethical things happen that I think we are not terribly aware of.

currently:
sipping single malt
wishing I had a pipe (they are in langley)
listening to John Tavener
thinking about ethics and choral music.


I wrote a long letter about choir today. I don't think I will send it. Br. Cyprian finally acted like a monk today and told me to pray in a way that I know I can't ignore. We need more people like that. I appreciated it. I love Br. Cyprian, but so often he is jovial and teaching us about the military.
I was talking to Stacy tonight and she called me on how I say things and then retract them, which is not really that loving. I suggested she eat, and then immediately shied away from telling her what to do, realizing that I was not being polite and respecting her right to self determination, or at least this is my interpretation of it, and she said I shouldn't do that, that it is important to mean what we say and say what we mean. I often think I do that, but I realize that I also say things and negate them as a backdoor into passive aggressive communication. I was glad she called me on it. I think it is important to be as straightforward as possible. easier said than done mind you.

6 comments:

Magdalen said...

"I think it is important to be as straightforward as possible."
Well... Speaking from someone who *is* very straightforward, well, yes, it's good to be forthright and honest. Simpler is better. It's a bit of a double-edge sword though. How many times now have you criticised me for things I've said, straightforward and honestly? Truthfully, I've lost count now, of how many times my honesty has gotten me in trouble. Sometimes it's best to just be silent. But that's, as you put it, easier said...

Matthew Francis said...

Congrats on the teaching job! I remember when I began my first proper teaching job, someone quoted me this dedication from a book... maybe it was a Parker Palmer book.

"To my students and my teachers, may God grant me the grace to forget who was who."

The Pleasant Peasant said...

"Br. Cyprian finally acted like a monk today" <-- thats priceless! Really, he is the coolest monk I've ever met (probably the first one too).

cathedral dweller said...

Hey Dave. Wondering what Br. Cyprian meant by "to pray in a way that I know I can't ignore."

Wondering what was meant by that? I think I know but I'm not sure.

pasivirta said...

maybe its my grammer, he said "pray" in a manner that I know not to ignore. that is not a quote, but it gives a clearer explique to what I meant. He asked if I prayed for _____, and I said sometimes. he looked at me the same way anyone with spiritual authority not their own does and said "always"
I said "sigh, okay"

biss said...

Oh! That's brilliant.
I love my godfather...though I think he acts like a monk most if not all of the time. Sometimes our perceptions just need adjusting.