wow. I really do. and like Phil was saying, it is so much about being
I visited with Fr. Lawrence this weekend in Ottawa, I went to a heirarchical litia, and liturgy, which were both uber long and very beautiful, I think liturgy was like three hours or something crazy like that. but it was gorgeous. but, just talking to Father Lawrence in the evenings, seeing Fr. John Scratch, a man who glows with God's love, and he saw me and glowed at me, smiling, and touched my face with both of his hands and asked me how I was, I told him "I remember who I am!" with glee, because, while I had not completely forgotten of course, I had become a little disoriented I guess. I am/we are so influenced by those around us, and I really like my friends from school, they are a lot of fun, and thoughtful. I was even accused by my friend who is gay of being open minded. I thought that was funny, because I don't fancy myself that open minded, I think I am able to not get all tied up with the way we all behave, because we all behave oddly every once in a while, so what good would it do to judge? I think they mistook love for open mindedness, anyways. after driving to ottawa with the remnants of a great evening coursing through my veins and a dull headache also reminding me of it, I knew I needed to be with people who would help me remember part of who I am that I had not been encouraged towards for a while. being around a whole pile of priests helped, they always grin, and its real. I know I am not explaining this well, but I will keep trying. (weezer is blessing my soul, say it aint so)
so, talking with Fr. Lawrence in the evenings, hearing about the council and plans and difficulties, talking about the church back home, talking about music, talking about anything, just reminded me of being at church, and then after church we did the same thing. just like at st. hermans, it was zeke, elizabeth, Fr. Lawrence and I, we were the only ones left in the lunchroom. at 330, we laughed at how it was like being at st.hermans, the last ones to leave. then we went to zeke and cheryl's apartment, which is the old rectory, its so cool. they live in the church.
I also did confession, it was short, and wonderful, and then Fr. Lawrence and I talked a bit about it, and it was so reassuring. He reminded me that it makes sense that being out in sudbury would be disorienting and difficult.

Oh, it was like a spiritual hot tub after living in the arctic, and I was given good clothes when I left, but boy I was getting cold.

I drove home last night, I even had REAL coffee, I never do that, but it worked out okay. they say its supposed to snow tomorrow, I hope so, I can't wait for it to be on the ground. its cold and clear here today.

Oh, and I drove Fr. Lawrence to the train station, and we listend to Dave Matthews Band on the way, I played Crash for him, and he said he didn't mind it, though he is glad it was not played at his daughter's wedding. I think his artistic ability/savvy is underestimated, at least it probably was by me. I get the impression that he is very cognizant of...at least some depth of aesthetic appreciation. my first clue was the poem he read at the fundraiser, it seems like he is really subtle and even humble or quiet about it, but its there. a thorough, thoughtful aesthetic.

right, I forgot I titled this post that way. but I do, oh I do. If I wasn't, I would kind of be free floating, and going to a variety of churches, which would be okay I guess, but a lot harder, and mind you the greek church is not my favourite place to be, but its consistent, and going to ottawa is certainly a worthwhile endeavour. and I talked to Fr. Lawrence about money too, and He helped me see that whatever I do, it should not necessarily be out of strict legalism, which of course even I am prone to sometimes, though I fancy myself a free spirit, whatever that means, so that was really freeing. that is really why I love orthodoxy, is because it is SO freeing. I remember how last spring and late winter I was blogging a lot about "this is why I love Orthodoxy" and its all true. today its because it sets me free to remember who I am even more than I knew before. I remember who I am becoming. I become more like Christ, I am really free to love, to be loud and silly, and to be silent and reverent, to feast and enjoy the fruits of the earth, to fast and conserve, to spend a ton of money on a meal, or to eat rice, the details are not what matters, but how and why you partake in whatever it is. Paul talks about how he can/has lived with abundance, and with little. its not about poverty for poverty, or wealth for wealth, but all for Christ, and by Christ. I remember talking with Christo about that a while ago, well, maybe it was at the bible study with Zach and Dan and James too, or maybe it was a MarsHill thing, I can't remember...but all for and by Christ. regardless of what it is.

anyways. I love being. and my being, as it will be shaped, I need it shaped by orthodoxy.


kimberley said...

Hey Dave!

Just flew from Edmonton this morning. Feeling a strong sense of renewal and liberty myself. It makes perfect sense after being in the midst of that much crystal clear truth.

Soak it all up brother.
See you back in a month.


Neo said...

Orthodoxy truly is awesome!!! Don't take Greeks too seriously, we're just crazy. If you get a chance while you are still in Ontario, visit

St. Kosmas Aitolos Convent
Abbess Alexia
14155 Caledon King Town
Line Rd. South
Bolton, Ont. L7E 5R7
Tel: (905) 859-2474
Fax: (905) 859-2505

Its probably like a couple hours drive, but it would be worth if you have the time. If you visit there, you will meet faithful Greeks (but still crazy) visiting there as well. Abbess Alexia is a really kind person too or so good friends of mine tell me.

Peace out,

Anonymous said...

Hi Dave; oh yeah, Bolton is about 4 to 6 hour drive from Sudbury.

Sounds like things are going strong for you and that's great. I still hope you can visit before you head back. It would and will be great to see you again. Three to four years is just too long.

Take care. See you soon buddy.

Simply Victoria said...

i love being orthodox too.
guess that's why i still am :)

myn said...

hey dave...i agree...i love being orthodox even though i have nothing to compare it to. i have had people ask me why i "chose" a church that is so traditional and restrictive...but they don't get it. it is the exact oposite of restrictive!!